It takes a Village!

Aaron spent two weeks in West Africa at the beginning of this month. Of course being apart is never easy, but we had the wonderful blessing of Mima and Vovo (my parents) coming to stay with us. We had a great time. Having them around was a good distraction from missing Aaron. It was also INCREDIBLY helpful. My parents are amazing servants. Honestly in my early years of marriage, I sometimes misunderstood their proactive serving as invading my boundaries. Today, I see different. They love through serving us. It gave them great pleasure to fly across the country to play with grandchildren, cook, help clean, do laundry, and be a support while Aaron was gone.  All this to say, we were well loved during their visit!

 

 

What could have been a very stressful and tiresome two weeks ended up being in some ways a break for this momma. I am so thankful for my village that helps me raise my kiddos! Thank you mom and dad!

The Middle - Guest Blogger Jackie Hooks

Aaron has periodically written on my blog with family/school/now work updates. I like the idea of guest posts. It's fun to have variety. So meet my friend Jackie Hooks. She's a dear friend. She's one that knows me well. We've walked many joys together. We've also walked some hard roads together. I'm continuously honored that God has allowed me to have a front row seat of His work in Jackie and her family's life. One thing that has always been true of Jackie is her desire to live in step with what God has for her and her family. It inspires me. When you read Jackie's writing, you may as well brew up a cup of your favorite coffee. Her writing is candid and genuine. I can hear her voice as I read! I hope you enjoy this post!

To learn more about what Jackie is up to you can check out her facebook page HERE, her Pruning Hooks site HERE, and her blog HERE.

The Middle...

I could paint you a really pretty picture.  I could paint you a picture that would seem, almost, perfect.  I could do it.  It’s not hard to do.  Watch:  My husband coaches our two oldest boys’ soccer teams.  He completely manages our finances, and I never have to worry about debt or money.  Corey and I have known each other since I was 7 and he was 8.  We met at YMCA camp…a gymnastics camp…that’s a humbling story for another time.  I’m a stay-at-home mom.  I cook dinner six nights a week.  We sit down to dinner as a family every night.  Corey prays for our sons every night while I read to our daughter, Grace.  We go to church every Sunday.  I’m on PTA.  My husband makes each of our kiddos the birthday cake of their choice for our family birthday dinner which is a tradition.  Corey does all the Santa Clause shopping because he absolutely loves doing that part of Christmas.  We have been married for 15 years.  Every Saturday and Sunday morning all four of our children snuggle in our bed.  Blah. Blah. Blah.

Have you thrown up yet?

 I could paint you a really pretty picture if I just give you some random facts.  If I do that, then I don’t tell you about yesterday.  And yesterday was really really really hard.

You see, we have been married for 15 years now, and that is the end of the beginning of our marriage.  If we stay married for 45-50 years (just using hopeful numbers here) then this is the end of the beginning of our marriage.  We have moved into the middle.  And we have moved to that middle with four kiddos and some water flowing under some bridges.  We have done our best to let things go, to move on, to move over as more people insist on snuggling on Saturday mornings, but, let’s face it, some Saturdays you want to sleep in a bed that is not crowded with little humans and their non-whispering voices.  We are in the middle.  Things happen in the middle of life.  Good things.  Bad things.  But things happen in the middle.  Things you will look back on for the rest of forever and remember with a smile.  Or with tears.  Things happen in the middle that make you look at the beginning with such nostalgia…like in the beginning we were so young and naïve…we had no idea…But we have ideas now.  This is the middle.  It is good.  But the naivety is long gone.

 

So, yesterday we awoke as we typically do with the baby smacking us in the face with either his hand or his empty sippy cup that once had milk in it.  This is a jarring experience even if it happens every day.  My husband is typically the recipient of this morning beating.  What can I say, the baby adores him.  I can hear Corey talking to Joshua.  They are happy, and Corey gives him his cup of milk and they snooze for a while longer.  Next comes Grace into the room and she is tattling.  One of her brothers has done something.  Her brothers are following her into our room.  I’m telling them to take turns talking, please whisper, put away everything that is remotely causing a problem and then I just stick them all in bed with Corey and I get up to make breakfast.  They all watch hockey.  The baby wakes up.  Corey is really into this hockey game.  I forget to make him coffee.  This is possibly a daily annoying occurance.  I make MY coffee, make breakfast, set the table, start the laundry, empty the dishwasher, begin my grocery list and call the world to order.  My little world comes to the table and Corey informs me not to worry, he has been blessed with the morning baby poop.  This does not appear to actually be a blessing.

We launch into the breakfast discussion of Saturday mornings:  who is going to what birthday party, at what time and what else has to be done.  I have a hair appointment.  I was going to run the birthday present buying errands with Grace.  Corey is making a stand that he would like to leave the house and not get stuck at home with the kids while I go shopping and as I am explaining how running errands does not constitute shopping at all, Grace chimes in that she thinks Daddy clearly needs to spend more time with her, and he should take her to buy the birthday presents.  Corey looks dumbfounded.  He tries to maneuver out of this and explain how I am so much better at this than he is, but he is stuck.  Grace doesn’t budge.  Corey will be running errands with Grace.  He hurries.  I clean the kitchen and get Grace moving.  He takes her to buy birthday presents.  This is not an easy task.  As he pulls out of the driveway I am thinking that he will wish that I had gone and not him, but Grace will be over the moon that it is her daddy and not me.  He calls me three times from the store. It’s not easy. 

He offers next to take Jude to some trampoline place for the birthday party he is attending, and I stay home as Grace is being picked up for her party, I feed baby Joshua in the meantime and Jake rides with his dad so he can hang out with him.  Corey drops Jude off, and gets a phone call about 15 minutes later that Jude is hurt.  He heads to Walgreens, grabs an ace bandage, heads back to the party and wraps Jude’s ankle, heads home just in time for Joshua’s nap as I leave to get my hair done…and I am running late…and Corey is really aware of this…he is hurrying…I could have made that easier on him…I didn’t.  While I am getting my hair done, he sends me pictures of Joshua waking up.  He lets me know since it is just him and the boys (Grace is still birthday partying), he is taking them to go get frozen yogurt.  And right in the middle of that day that may have just gotten a little bit easier, my car broke.  Yep.  My car won’t start.  I have his car, and he has my mini van so he can take the kiddos for a treat.  He calls a neighbor with jumper cables, attaches them, turns on the car and the engine makes a horrible noise and starts smoking. 

Yesterday there were about 582 text messages over about a 2 ½ hour period about cars, who was to blame, how the kids were acting horrible while he was trying to figure out what to do.  There were text messages apologizing saying it was not anyone’s fault.  There were text messages that were rude, funny, blaming, more apologies, factual, diplomatic, depressing, wise and stupid all in the span of 2 ½ hours while I was getting my hair done and Corey was navigating the waters of four kids (Grace came home), a broken car and a warranty while the hours ticked away on his Saturday.  Corey was stuck in the middle of our life.  In the middle of a typical Saturday filled with lots of 10 minute moments in the mini van, remembering to feed people, answering an exorbitant amount of questions, reminding people to use their inside voices please, telling kids to back up from the TV more than anyone should ever have to have that conversation, setting 2 million timers so that kiddos will actually take fair turns, sending kids outside, bringing them all back in, dealing with a wife who he knows rarely gets her hair done (who might have reminded him of that quite often), trying to make everything smooth, trying to not place blame when clearly I knew my car was making a noise and clearly I had just kept ignoring it…He was in the middle.  He was stuck between his wants, everyone else’s needs and who God has called him to be…

And it was Valentine’s Weekend, y’all.

And he bought me a new big orange purse.

He even got me a gushy card.

And I was off getting my hair done…

Y’all, it was supposed to be so much better than the middle of life on a Saturday.

 

I’m thinking about Joseph tonight.  Mary’s husband of few words, but huge deeds.  I’m thinking about him staying with her through the good and the bad and the busy.  I’m wondering if he felt like there was a nobler calling to his life because he was helping to raise the Messiah, or if there were days he was just a carpenter raising a small crew of kiddos and wishing that Mary didn’t always forget to make him a cup of coffee too.  In Matthew 2:13-23 we read about Joseph, just after the Magi left, having an urgent dream telling him to take Mary and Baby Jesus to Egypt because King Herod is going to try to kill Jesus.  And Joseph got up, took them and made sure Jesus was safe.  King Herod killed every boy who was two years old and under in Bethlehem and the surrounding towns.  Joseph’s obedience had kept Jesus safe and alive.  The little family stayed in Egypt until Herod died, which is when Joseph had another dream (vs. 19) where an angel of the Lord again appeared to him and told him to return to the land of Israel.  And on this journey, Joseph would have another dream telling him to go to Galilee, and they lived in Nazareth keeping Jesus safe again.  All of this is really amazing.  And Mary, I bet she came to rely on Joseph and what he had to say.  His obedience to God had saved their family.  His willingness to follow God had changed their lives many times, and they had always been safe and they had always been protected.  And Joseph had been the one to manage in the middle of all that chaos which kept coming their way.  We don’t hear a word from Mary in Matthew 2:13-23.  This is our window to see Joseph.  Don’t miss it. 

So, this family, the Hooks Family, we are a mess a minute.  We are constantly sinking in a sea of laundry, and running a few minutes late, and bath time and bed time.  We are constantly pulled in twelve different directions all at once.  And it’s not real pretty, y’all.  I could paint you the pinterest picture, but the real picture is so much more real, ya know?  The real picture is that I am a wife in the middle of my marriage.  I am married to a man who is in the middle of that same marriage too.  We are trying.  And sometimes we are not trying at all.  But I know, what I’m sure Mary came to know too, I cannot do it without this man.  All the trials in the beginning and we are still here stepping headlong into the middle, and the fact that we’re here, well, let me just offer a round of applause.  No, a standing ovation.  My knight in shining armor is often dressed in business casual, and his hair is turning grey.  My partner in crime falls asleep on the couch when we watch a kid movie and pretends like he was awake the whole time.  My better half is the best chocolate chip pancake maker in the universe, and on the mornings that he makes them the whole house is happy…he even makes heart ones for Grace…and they seldom notice how great that is…yep that’s real y’all.  It is his obedience to Jesus that has kept him here, kept us together and saved us more times than I can count.  And I can’t do this without him.  And the bottom line is that I never want to.

 

 

This morning the same brigade of children began to trickle into our room and cram their way into our bed.  Four people lay between the two of us.  Somehow, or by some miracle, underneath the comforter and in the sea of feet, my foot touched his and I felt that same jolt from 15 years ago…when my much younger feet would find his under the covers…And I almost cried.  I looked across the four precious children in our bed who were alternately arguing about what channel to watch and who had the most room, and I saw him…my man.  He is nothing like the man I married.  He is older.  He is sleepier.  He is much more protective of me than he ever was before.  His glasses are a necessity now, and he sleeps with cough drops by his bed.  He is calmer.  He is wiser.  He is actually a lot funnier.  He is braver.  He is here.  Right here.  In the middle of it all.  With me.  And we have made it to the middle.  And I think I know a little of what Mary must have known after all of the chaos of moving in the middle of the night with Joseph and the baby…the craziness that was the beginning of their marriage…when she had to trust that this man, the same man who forgot to make reservations at the Inn when she was 9 months pregnant, was the man to trust in the middle of a crisis…That was the beginning of her marriage too.  And by the time Mary had made it to the middle, and they were raising all the kids in Nazareth, she knew what we all know in the middle:  she NEEDED him.

There is not one crisis, or hiccup, or headache, or family gathering, or report card day, or sports scheduling nightmare, or sleepless night filled with sick kids, or road trip, or broken down car, or forgotten morning coffee that I want to spend with anyone else. 

Not anyone else.  Ever.

“So they are no longer two, but one.  Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.”  (Matthew 19:6)

 

Straddling the Atlantic - By Aaron

Disclaimer: He wrote this on February 5th - late post!

Greetings family and friends!

I hope your year is off to a great start. Are you wondering where January went? Me, too! I'd like to share a few highlights with you as well as let you know what's around the corner for our family.

Stock Show and Rodeo

The Stock Show and Rodeo in Fort Worth is an annual event that lasts for about a month in January. We got tickets from my dad this year and got to take the kids. They came back making lassos, roping calves, and riding broncos and, of course, all had hats and boots! Did you know that rodeos are as popular in Brazil as they are in Texas?

Educating the Next Generation

Austin turns five this May which means that kindergarten is just around the corner. As we are considering our options (including public, charter and home school), the process has caused us to reflect deeply on what it means to educate a child and train him up in the way he should go. We all want our children to read and write and excel in all they do. How often are we concerned about their hearts? their character? their ability to serve others? or their opportunities to connect with people from other cultures or neighborhoods? What a blessing and a challenge!

Headed East...to West Africa

I'll be working the next 15 days in Niger and Sierra Leone. Due to Evelina's birth last fall, this will be my first opportunity to visit what constitutes 99% of Restore Hope's work with communities. I look forward to seeing firsthand how lives are being transformed, visiting with field workers, meeting new partners, and more. In terms of human development, Sierra Leone and Niger both rank among the ten lowest in the world so there's A LOT of work to be done. The challenge is knowing HOW to work.

Who do you follow?

Pinch yourself if your first thought was about a social media update! A few weeks ago I taught a lesson at church about discipleship. In a practical sense, I shared that discipleship means following someone so closely and intentionally that you become like them, know what they know, and do what they do. Whose life is shaping yours? Whose life are you shaping? How much of this shaping is intentional or desirable?

"As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another." - Proverbs 27:17

God bless,

 

Aaron Pierce

Executive Director

 

Restore Hope

www.restorehopeproject.org

facebook.com/RestoreHopeToday

Transition Pains

I've been asked so many times, "How are the boys doing with their baby sister?" Really they have surprised us with how well they've taken to her. There has been very little if any jealously demonstrated. Neither Austin or Jonathan have shown any resentment at all towards Evelina. However, about 3 weeks ago, Jonathan just started acting "off". All of a sudden he kicked into whinny mode. Every morning he would ask me to snuggle him in his bed. He would say "Mooommmma, mommmma, mooommmmmmmaaaaa...." INCESSANTLY!!!! Worse of all, we began to completely back pedal with potty accidents. I questioned what was happening. I wracked my brain contemplating the root issue. Was he not getting enough momma time. Did he need more hugs. More one on one time with me and Aaron. What was happening. Then one friend suggestion it may be a delayed adjustment period because of the baby. After one friend said it - three more suggested the same. Ah-ha! That's it. He's realized she's sticking around. He's no longer the baby! Though the "needy" behaviors are still lingering a bit, it helps so much to know what is most likely the root of things. This has reminded me as a momma to not just get super irritated with "issues" but to do a little digging, processing, and seeking counsel in parenting. Shedding light on things always helps the challenging time easier to endure! All in all though, I cannot complain. I am so thankful that Jonathan's growing pains has not been negativity towards his sister. I'd much rather him demand more of me, than resent her!

He asks to keep her company and play with her.

He wants to hold her.

He reads to her.

He goofs around and asks that I take pictures of them together (he came up with this pose all by himself).

He sometimes complies for a pose I request!
 

This is my little man. My "iron man". He's all boy. Has energy to span the whole family. He loves to tell stories and play pretend. Though you may not see this on your first encounter with him, his heart is soft and tender. He loves deeply and hurts loudly! His personality is perfect for a middle child because it's BIG!

 

AND HE LOVES HIS BABY SISTER!

 



 

 

Don't we all go through needy seasons? Isn't there times when you want to just whine loudly and ask for morning snuggles. That certainly is true of me, though it's completely not socially acceptable. For Jonathan it's age appropriate - and for now, I'm grateful to indulge him! 

The Brother Baby Whisperer

I love my Austin. He's smart. He's funny. He loves quality time with us. He likes super heros. His latest passion (as of Saturday's adventure at the Fort Worth Stock Show and Rodeo) is calf roping. He is competitive. Anything can be a race. He likes to learn and is figuring out how to put letters together to make a word. He loves to wrestle. He likes baseball and has impressed us with his skill to hit a ball. All this I expected when I thought of my first born being four. However, there's often things in this little guy that surprise me. He is attentive (to EVERYTHING). He can hold a conversation with an adult like I've never seen a 4 year old do. He often takes the youngest child under his wing. Once he told a friend that he was "practicing for when I am a daddy". One time when he was deciding not to nap, he said that the bed didn't "suit him"!  Another friend of ours coined it when he said, "Austin is an old soul". It's so very true and it's a cool, quirky thing that makes him who he is!

Along with these tendencies to behave much older than what he is, he has repeatedly ask me to hold Evelina in our carrier. Last week the opportunity arose for him to try it out. He was elated! As you can see, she didn't think it was such a bad idea either!

 

 

He was so proud of him self for being able to carry her around (we usually just let them hold her sitting down). I realized that this point that without me ever noticing, he had been watching me like a hawk. He swayed JUST LIKE I DO. He taped her bottom JUST LIKE I DO. I was watching a mini-me.  Yes, part of my momma heart was nervous that both would go tumbling and I would find blood from both of their heads painting my floors. However, I attempted to stifle that feeling in effort to nurture the caretaker in my little man! Shortly after he got her on, he said, "Momma, I hope she falls asleep." Ohhh everything in me melted. "IIIII hope she falls asleep too sweet Austin". I thought to myself.

I was afraid of him injuring himself so I encouraged him to sit down with her. So he took her to their room and sat on Jonathan's bed. All the while, in my mind, "I hope she falls asleep. "I hope she falls asleep. "I hope she falls asleep." You see, to Austin, Evelina sleeping was his affirmation of a job well done. I wanted his heart to be encouraged! Yes, I may have even prayed for it!

And what to do you know....?
SHE DID!

She fell fast asleep. He was so proud. I was so proud. He'd loved on his little sister. It was exactly what she needed - a little cat nap to hold her over until everyone's nap time. I didn't have the arms to do it as I was getting lunch on the table. Austin, my little man with a servant heart, wanted to help momma. His caretaker spirit, wanted to snuggle his sister. All of our hearts were full!

 

Just a fun Friday

While we were in FL over thanksgiving, my brother gave me his camera. I have loved having it. But I've tended to only bring it out on special occasions. It caught my eye today and I decided to snap some pictures. As I have gone back and read past blog entries, I realize that the seasons pass oh so quickly and I long for more pictures capturing the ordinary magic of each day. So here we are, the Pierces on a normal Friday in January 2014. There so much joy in watching these kids. I want to cling to these moments!

2013

2013 was perhaps the most intense year of my life. Although 2003 was pretty crazy with graduating from college, moving home, getting engaged, then married, then moving across the world. But I think 2013 still comes ahead. On January first this year, I thought back to 1/1/13 and our lives were SO DIFFERENT. It's wild to think how many changes we've been through. So for the sake of remembering - here's a very abbreviated play by play!

January - Started the year off in Bebedoro, Brazil with my extended family. Had a great visit with them. We found out we were expecting our third baby. Aaron narrowed down job options to two choices: White House Fellowship and Restore Hope.
 j
February-March - Had a great time as a family as Aaron was on "summer" break. I was so blessed with his presence because for the first time in pregnancy I was incredibly sick during the first trimester. It was awesome to have him home to help tend to the boys as I often went back to bed after breakfast!

March-April - Aaron returns to school. We finalized that he would be taking a job with Restore Hope in Arlington. We made plans to return to NYC to celebrate Aaron's graduation in May. We decided it would be best for the boys and I to stay in the US at that point because of the pregnancy. Aaron would return to Brazil to finish his last quarter of school.

May - The boys and I said goodbye to Sao Paulo. It was a bitter sweet goodbye. There were tender friendships that were hard to leave.

It was so neat to process the time in Sao Paulo and see how God had filled us with joy. He had bonded us as a family unit. He had challenged us and sharpened us.   Because we were flying by miles, the boys and I had to leave before Aaron was done with the semester.  During the first part of our visit in NY we were able to reunite with friends and enjoy the city. The second part we reunited with family and celebrated the incredible accomplishment of grad school. It was hard to fathom that Aaron was graduating. So much went into this degree for all of us. For Aaron, it was tremendous amount of discipline, determination, and effort to apply himself fully to very difficult (though very rewarding) academic work while still being a very present daddy and sweet husband. For me, it was learning to navigate new cities, pursuing relationships with fervor, trying to support Aaron's efforts as best I could, while raising two very active little boys. For the boys it was, leaving everything they knew as soon as it became familiar! These words are only a fraction of all the emotion that charged us while in NYC in May. I could hardly look at Aaron in his gown without weeping! It was an incredibly emotional, exciting time!

 

 

June-July - The boys and I returned to Texas and Aaron returned to Brazil to finish his course in Brazil. The time apart proved to be more challenging than we ever imagined. Aaron was incredibly busy with hosting friends, finishing a volunteer project for a needy community in Sao Paulo, closing out our apartment, and not to mention finishing his degree. All this done during major riots in Sao Paulo that were often being manifested within blocks of his school and on his route home. The boys and I so thankful to be among family and reconnecting with friends. However, the stress of having Aaron far coupled with so many unknowns in our immediate future was often difficult to juggle. Aaron got to have a fun filled return to the US. He met his best friend Micah in NYC to load all of our belongings into a moving truck. They had many adventures driving back to TX. Among their stops sight seeing in Washington DC and Vicksburg to see the Civil War memorial.  It was a very sweet reunion in Mid July when daddy pulled up in a big yellow truck!

July-September - We hit the ground running after Aaron arrived. We had a TON to do to get settled into a life in the states. We bought two cars, got phones, figured out insurance, decided on a preschool program for the boys, had baby showers, moved into First Baptist Arlington's Mission house and began house hunting. It was a very full season.

September 16 was a BIG day for our family. After 10 years of being married (and living in apartments) we closed on our first home.

It was a super sweet moment. We celebrating with friends and family coming over to the empty house and eating pizza as we sat on the floor and kids ran free in our new backyard! That day was also Evelina's "due" date. Late that night as I was thinking maybe I can at least begin labor on her due date I got a call from Aaron. He said. "I have good news and bad news." The good news was his softball team had won the game they were playing. The bad news was he had fallen on his shoulder while trying to catch a ball and was headed to the emergency room. We later learned that he had separated his AC joint and would take several months to have full function on his right arm! Perfect timing! My parents were already in town awaiting the arrival of the first grand daughter. We could not have been more blessed by their service to our family. With me being so pregnant and Aaron having only one arm (his left one at that!) We truly needed the help they so lovingly and selflessly provided!

Our sweet Evelina waited paitently within me until chaos of the world she was about to enter settled. On September 26th Evelina Joy made her way into our arms quickly and swiftly! She was born in the mission house we were residing in surrounded with an abundance of love. The boys immediately took to her and loved on her. We welcomed her into our arms with overwhelming gratitude!

October - This was the month I nearly lost my mind! With a baby that was only 2 weeks old, we decided to go on and move into our home. We had been "in transition" since May and were eager to get settled. October 19th was our 10th anniversary. We celebrated with our newly expanded family of 5 at Walmart buying things for our home. Yes, seems anticlimactic, but it's exactly what both of us wanted to be doing!

 

November - We began to feel a little more settled. I decided the rest of the boxes (mostly books needing a book shelf) would have to be ignored. If I was dealing with unpacking boxes I was just not a stable human being! Transitioning to three children was a joy as long as I wasn't trying to unpack. So I resolved to pretend the boxes were a wall! We also traveled to FL for an early thanksgiving celebration. We had a sweet time with my parents and family.

 

December - We really enjoyed Christmas this year. From early December all the way until the 25th, we celebrated! We bought our tree and decorated it in the middle of an ice storm.

The boys loved the anticipation of Christmas. I read a book called the Greatest Gift by Ann Voskamp. It made the advent season so very rich for me. We had not had Christmas in Texas since 2009. Christmas Eve and Christmas day were super sweet as we got to celebrate with family and in our new home.

 

 

 

 

2013 was an incredibly full year. It had some of the biggest joys and biggest trials we have ever faced as a family. I am so deeply grateful for it. Though it proved to be very challenging, the lessons and memories it produced were true gifts to be treasured. Here's to 2014. Just like day one of 2013, we have no idea what this year holds for us, but we will strive to remain close to the Lord and lean into all He will show us this year. Happy New Year!